How is it that this March Break is almost over? One week passes us by so quickly. For once, and this is such a rare thing for us, we didn't do much of anything. We had an aborted trip to visit my parents-in-law (it was supposed to be 5 days but Pk's onset of sickness, which turned out to be due to over-exhaustion, brought us home after 2 days) and some shopping to do but otherwise, we were home. We had two days that the kids didn't even get out of their jammies (although we did ask them to have a bath and get into new ones in the evening) and they were blissfully happy. Pk was out at riding camp today and Lb spent the day hanging out with Dh and I and he was just so happy and relaxed.
Pondering it made me a bit sad. We live in Ontario, in Canada, and we have a full-day kindergarten programme here that starts at age 4. Lb seems to like it well enough and loves his teacher and talks a lot about school. Lately, though, we have found him somewhat resistant to going and when we asked why, he said that there's too much work. It's supposed to be a play-based programme (which it largely is) but based on the stack of worksheets that Lb brought home last week, clearly there is pencil and paper going on, too. Seeing how happy and creative and affectionate he has been this week with the structure lifted really convinces me more than ever that 4 year olds shouldn't have to go to school all day. I wish I had the option to stay home with him (yes, I know, there are many who would say that if I really wanted to, I could stay home but in the current economic climate and given how absolutely impossible it is to get into teaching here these days, I can't risk giving it up). I wish Lb could spend much of his time playing outside, creating with his cars, building with blocks and climbing into my lap for a story whenever he wanted it. For that matter, I wish that Pk, who is in grade 2, could have more of that kind of freedom as well.
We are not good at time. My kids do too many lessons (but when we have brought up the subject of giving something up, there are tears - they both adore skating, Pk lives for horseback riding, they love Awana at the church and Dh and I are strong believers that they need to get a musical start). Our schedule is tight and our weekends always seem to be taken up with social commitments and errands. There was a time that we used to call Sundays "free days" - we went to church and that's it. The computer and t.v. stayed off and we didn't use anything like a tablet. I'm wondering whether we might need that as a kind of palate cleaner again. The kids love that freedom and especially now that it's warming up, it will be so nice to go back to hiking as a family and being outside, working on our garden, playing and just hanging out. As part of my year of "gentle", clearly I am going to need to work harder at finding that open time to just let us all be. We have all thrived on it this week and we will be going back to school on Monday so much the better for it!
Friday, March 20, 2015
Thursday, March 19, 2015
Our New Baby
Sh! I am not telling anyone except for very close friends around here until she is actually here because I try not to get too excited in case things fall through. She does have to get to Canada from California and all, so there are lots of possible complications. I'm dying to show someone, though, so here she is:
Isn't she sweet? We can't wait to have her arrive (despite the fact that I remember puppies turning our world upside down in the past!)
Yarn Along
I love the weekly Yarn Along hosted by Ginny at Small Things. It's done so much to motivate me to knit! I want to make sure that I have something to post and it keeps me on task. Hooray! I have three pregnant friends and I need to get going on baby blankets so this might provide me the motivation I need.
We went north to visit the inlaws this past weekend (the visit was supposed to be longer but Pk suffering a bout of what Dh's family calls "tummy wobbles" put paid to that). Oh, well, that seems to be our lives these days. On the plus side, 2 1/2 hours in the car each way did give me some knitting time and there are two new projects under way.
First of all, I finished my Guernsey Wrap. I love how it has turned out. It needs a bit of blocking but since it's a gift for next November or so, I think I'll have time. I had a bunch of yarn left so I wanted to use it up. I noticed several people had done the Reversatile cowl and it seemed a perfect car project. It's almost done and I will probably give it to the same recipient as the wrap, since I hate wearing gray (I don't dislike the colour, it just looks terrible on me).
I have a question for anyone reading. I am making this on a set of interchangeable needles on the cord and I am HATING them. They keep coming unscrewed and even when they are just loose, they catch my yarn. Am I the only person who has this problem? Is there something I am missing? It's driving me CRAZY!
In terms of reading, I am still reading The Fringe Hours by Jessica Turner (which is speaking to me more and more as I read and I think will have a big impact on my use of time), Found by Micha Boyett (which is shocking me at how much I love it - I wasn't sure it would speak to me when I saw it featured on the SheLoves book club but my oh my, do I ever feel "found" myself reading this book - she shares so much of what I have felt in my faith along the way). For lighter, fun reading, I am enjoying The Handsome Man's Deluxe Cafe by Alexander McCall Smith. I love his books, especially the No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency and the Isabel Dalhousie series. There is a sweetness to his books that is in no way cloying and I just love them. I have friends who hate them, though - his books are slow and reflective but I don't find them boring, I just wish I could meet these people myself!
I can't wait to see what everyone else is reading and stitching this week!
We went north to visit the inlaws this past weekend (the visit was supposed to be longer but Pk suffering a bout of what Dh's family calls "tummy wobbles" put paid to that). Oh, well, that seems to be our lives these days. On the plus side, 2 1/2 hours in the car each way did give me some knitting time and there are two new projects under way.
First of all, I finished my Guernsey Wrap. I love how it has turned out. It needs a bit of blocking but since it's a gift for next November or so, I think I'll have time. I had a bunch of yarn left so I wanted to use it up. I noticed several people had done the Reversatile cowl and it seemed a perfect car project. It's almost done and I will probably give it to the same recipient as the wrap, since I hate wearing gray (I don't dislike the colour, it just looks terrible on me).
I have a question for anyone reading. I am making this on a set of interchangeable needles on the cord and I am HATING them. They keep coming unscrewed and even when they are just loose, they catch my yarn. Am I the only person who has this problem? Is there something I am missing? It's driving me CRAZY!
I also started working on this lovely Nemue cabled wrap/scarf. I love cables and I had a bunch of this colour left in Cascade Eco and it just seemed to go together well. I love anything with cables and this is no exception. It's a trickier pattern to read and I had to pull it out and start again when someone knocked my knitting and it got pulled and my attempt to rescue it didn't work but at least I am back as far as I had gotten. It will definitely need good blocking when it's done.
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
Unexpected
I think I have mentioned here that about three weeks ago, we had to put down our special dog, Chelsea. We adored her and she was our "before kids" dog. She truly changed our lives. Our breeder wanted us to show and before we knew it, we were doing dog shows, trying hunt test work (and you will never meet two people less likely to fire a gun), doing competitive obedience and mostly just spending lots of time outside with our wonderful dog (which became dogs). We got another, Lucie, and we even fostered River, a lovely liver roan boy, for almost two years. River found a new home a month ago and then, our beloved Chelsea had to be put down at almost 14 due to what looked a lot like a stroke.
It only took us a couple of days to decide that we needed another dog but we didn't know how we were going to do it. We knew we wanted another purebred Brittany (and the whole purebred vs. shelter dog/rescue is a conversation for another day - we would love a shelter dog down the road but we want to compete and possibly even breed down the road so we need a purebred puppy). We knew we were looking at a lot more money than we could spend, a long time on a waiting list, an exhaustive search for the "right" breeding (never knowing for sure that we were making the correct decision) and then, the cost of getting the puppy (which would almost certainly have to come from the U.S. which would involve passports and travel expenses). We decided that we wouldn't rush into anything and despite Dh's determination that we needed to start looking for a puppy NOW (he, who was so opposed to a puppy in the past), I tried and tried not to get swept up into puppy frenzy and to be level headed and responsible. We are teachers, there is a threat of a strike down the road and we can't spend money right now.
Then, literally out of the blue, a puppy seems to have landed in our laps - a better pedigree than I would have ever thought we could get (breeders tend to keep their best stuff themselves and as people who wouldn't promise to show in the U.S., we didn't think we'd have a chance), the shipping is taken care of because a friend is going to get her puppy and wants to bring it back for us, a breeder who is excited to sell us the puppy and she is LOVELY! I am trying not to get overexcited until the puppy is actually here but we can't help but feel like God meant this to happen, because so many things have lined up in ways that we could never have anticipated.
Cross your fingers for us! This is a dream for us and our family could use something like this right now. I'll post pictures when she arrives, in about 4 weeks :-)
It only took us a couple of days to decide that we needed another dog but we didn't know how we were going to do it. We knew we wanted another purebred Brittany (and the whole purebred vs. shelter dog/rescue is a conversation for another day - we would love a shelter dog down the road but we want to compete and possibly even breed down the road so we need a purebred puppy). We knew we were looking at a lot more money than we could spend, a long time on a waiting list, an exhaustive search for the "right" breeding (never knowing for sure that we were making the correct decision) and then, the cost of getting the puppy (which would almost certainly have to come from the U.S. which would involve passports and travel expenses). We decided that we wouldn't rush into anything and despite Dh's determination that we needed to start looking for a puppy NOW (he, who was so opposed to a puppy in the past), I tried and tried not to get swept up into puppy frenzy and to be level headed and responsible. We are teachers, there is a threat of a strike down the road and we can't spend money right now.
Then, literally out of the blue, a puppy seems to have landed in our laps - a better pedigree than I would have ever thought we could get (breeders tend to keep their best stuff themselves and as people who wouldn't promise to show in the U.S., we didn't think we'd have a chance), the shipping is taken care of because a friend is going to get her puppy and wants to bring it back for us, a breeder who is excited to sell us the puppy and she is LOVELY! I am trying not to get overexcited until the puppy is actually here but we can't help but feel like God meant this to happen, because so many things have lined up in ways that we could never have anticipated.
Cross your fingers for us! This is a dream for us and our family could use something like this right now. I'll post pictures when she arrives, in about 4 weeks :-)
Sunday, March 15, 2015
Lemons and Lemonade
This was one of those weeks. On Monday, I got sick and it hit me hard and fast and it didn't take me long to realise it was strep throat. It always knocks me out totally and I spent Tuesday and Wednesday in bed. We had arranged for the kids to go to work with us on Thursday - since I teach kindergarten and LB is in kindergarten and Dh teaches grade 2 and Pk is in grade 2, our principals agreed to let us bring them in for the day. We had been looking forward to it for a long time. Thursday morning during breakfast, Lb came down with yucky symptoms that you don't need described that made it plain that our day of plans was done and it ended up that Dh had to stay home with a sickie and Pk and I went to our respective schools. Friday was the day before our March Break and just before leaving work to begin my week off, I ended up with in very uncomfortable meeting that involved being hung out to dry in a meeting by colleagues when it was supposed to be our working together to solve a problem with a situation that was completely beyond my control. My one saving grace was the fact that we were getting away to visit my husband's family and the mere fact of not having to cook for a few days and having a change of scenery was making me feel as if I might, just might, make it through.
We got there o.k. and yesterday was a good day until during dinner with friends, when it started to become clear that Pk was coming down with something. After a night of her crying, throwing up on my bed and being restless all night (and there is little worse that dealing with a sick child in a small house that is not your own with no idea where the paper towel and change of sheets are and trying not to wake everyone), this morning, we packed up the car and came home with our tails between our legs, afraid that we had unknowingly infected my f.i.l. with illness when he is dealing with auto-immune issues. By the time we got home, I was exhausted, frustrated, feeling a bit like the universe was conspiring against me and close to a pity party but only too tired to indulge too heavily in feeling sorry for myself. So much for a nice change of scenery - instead, I was back in my messy house with my m.i.l.'s kindly intended but frustrating words, "I worry about you because you do so much and you have such a heavy job and I see you trying to keep a house like s.i.l. does and you just can't expect that. I wish I was closer so I could come and help you." All I could see was dust and frustration.
I don't pretend to being mature enough to consciously move past my self-pity and frustration but somehow, it happened. I decided that cleaning was going to have to be the order of the day for my sanity and I thought that tackling my room, the one room not overwhelmingly dominated by children's mess, might be a good plan. Dh and I decided that we were going to go all the way and clean out clothing for a Salvation Army run tomorrow. It ended up being a lovely trip down memory lane. I remember, when I was young, that once in a while, my mom would decide to organize and my favourite part was when she decided to clean out her drawers. Her top drawer was always the most fun - that was her catch-all drawer and it contained things like family jewelry and old photographs. Before you get too excited, there is nothing there of anything other than sentimental value (pragmatic minister's wives that they were, you spent money on things like dishes that would be used by company and not on jewelry) but still, as I started my dresser, it brought back those memories and before I knew it, Pk was asking me questions about things like my grandmother's cameos and the bracelet that still has the note that went with it when my great, great aunt, who was a teacher in a small town one room school, that was presented to her by her students in 1909. I rediscovered some clothing that I forgot I had and actually liked (and even a few pieces that might fit - getting ready for spring with some healthy eating and lots of exercise is definitely in order). I feel like I am going back to work next week having met myself, just a little bit, in the frustration and the exhaustion and that maybe, just maybe, I might be able to create a bit of order in the chaos that will bring me comfort.
I'm a homebody at the end of the day and sometimes life throws me these times when I have to stay home and then, I remember that I kind of like it here. Just remind me I said that when I start trying to create some order in the chaos that is our rec room tomorrow morning!
We got there o.k. and yesterday was a good day until during dinner with friends, when it started to become clear that Pk was coming down with something. After a night of her crying, throwing up on my bed and being restless all night (and there is little worse that dealing with a sick child in a small house that is not your own with no idea where the paper towel and change of sheets are and trying not to wake everyone), this morning, we packed up the car and came home with our tails between our legs, afraid that we had unknowingly infected my f.i.l. with illness when he is dealing with auto-immune issues. By the time we got home, I was exhausted, frustrated, feeling a bit like the universe was conspiring against me and close to a pity party but only too tired to indulge too heavily in feeling sorry for myself. So much for a nice change of scenery - instead, I was back in my messy house with my m.i.l.'s kindly intended but frustrating words, "I worry about you because you do so much and you have such a heavy job and I see you trying to keep a house like s.i.l. does and you just can't expect that. I wish I was closer so I could come and help you." All I could see was dust and frustration.
I don't pretend to being mature enough to consciously move past my self-pity and frustration but somehow, it happened. I decided that cleaning was going to have to be the order of the day for my sanity and I thought that tackling my room, the one room not overwhelmingly dominated by children's mess, might be a good plan. Dh and I decided that we were going to go all the way and clean out clothing for a Salvation Army run tomorrow. It ended up being a lovely trip down memory lane. I remember, when I was young, that once in a while, my mom would decide to organize and my favourite part was when she decided to clean out her drawers. Her top drawer was always the most fun - that was her catch-all drawer and it contained things like family jewelry and old photographs. Before you get too excited, there is nothing there of anything other than sentimental value (pragmatic minister's wives that they were, you spent money on things like dishes that would be used by company and not on jewelry) but still, as I started my dresser, it brought back those memories and before I knew it, Pk was asking me questions about things like my grandmother's cameos and the bracelet that still has the note that went with it when my great, great aunt, who was a teacher in a small town one room school, that was presented to her by her students in 1909. I rediscovered some clothing that I forgot I had and actually liked (and even a few pieces that might fit - getting ready for spring with some healthy eating and lots of exercise is definitely in order). I feel like I am going back to work next week having met myself, just a little bit, in the frustration and the exhaustion and that maybe, just maybe, I might be able to create a bit of order in the chaos that will bring me comfort.
I'm a homebody at the end of the day and sometimes life throws me these times when I have to stay home and then, I remember that I kind of like it here. Just remind me I said that when I start trying to create some order in the chaos that is our rec room tomorrow morning!
Friday, March 13, 2015
Honesty
I'm a teacher and today, we have been in meetings all day. One of the meetings was about online safety and it led to some interesting discussion that has left me thinking (and feeling vaguely uncomfortable).
Is Facebook so bad? It seems that whenever I speak to people, they like to go on about how they NEVER use Facebook, they lurk, they never put anything on there that other people might see, they wish they could hide more than they do. It leaves me feeling as if I somehow am missing something. I generally like Facebook (or should I say "like"?) I like keeping up with what people are doing, where they are going and what they are thinking about. My life is so busy and I am an introvert, I can't be out and about seeing all of these people all the time but it doesn't mean that I don't care about them. Is it too much information to know that someone's child is sick (so I might make a treat to drop by) or that their cat died (I might send a card or give a call)? Is it bad of me, when I'm feeling especially excited about something or worried or wanting more information, to ask other people with whom I have some things in common, to go on a post a message? Does this make me some kind of crazy person?
Sure, I know people who probably post too much information but for someone like me, I'm o.k. with that, usually. I like honesty, I like transparency, I value people who are out there and who share what they really think and feel. I don't like trying to figure out whether you really agree with someone or whether you might have another opinion. I suppose that some of it might be related to the fact that I am very careful in choosing friends that I opt for people who 1. are compassionate, 2. don't mind people who disagree and 3. who like to move beyond small talk (my introverted heart has trouble with small talk - if I don't feel like we are connecting, I feel like something is wrong). I probably am too "out" on Facebook for some people - I don't hide that I am a Christian, that I value compassion and social justice or that I love my family. I do call injustice when I see it and sometimes, that might make someone uncomfortable. I have a hard time seeing how that is a bad thing. I guess, on some level, it might be like not raising politics or religion at the dinner table but if these people are supposed to be "my friends", won't they still love me even if my opinion is different from theirs? Maybe, just maybe, there might be useful dialogue that comes from these Facebook discussions sometimes (provided that people behave with respect and I find that my friends do). My policy is that I don't say anything on Facebook that I would be ashamed to admit to (so yes, while I won't tell you that I can't stand this person I am working with, I might address an issue of concern to me in education if I feel that it is harming the well-being of children). I'd happily admit to my boss or my minister or my mom what I am saying, so why is it a bad thing? Maybe it might be potentially held again me down the road but I come from a family of political activists - data was being collected on them for their stands long before Google came along.
Am I naive or taking unnecessary risks or am I just having the courage to say what I think is right and potentially to risk pushing people a bit in their thinking? I'm not sure - I suppose this post sounds like I am entirely defending my position but that isn't entirely what I'm doing here. I think I'm still working it out. In the meantime, I probably won't shut up because I'm not good at that :-)
Is Facebook so bad? It seems that whenever I speak to people, they like to go on about how they NEVER use Facebook, they lurk, they never put anything on there that other people might see, they wish they could hide more than they do. It leaves me feeling as if I somehow am missing something. I generally like Facebook (or should I say "like"?) I like keeping up with what people are doing, where they are going and what they are thinking about. My life is so busy and I am an introvert, I can't be out and about seeing all of these people all the time but it doesn't mean that I don't care about them. Is it too much information to know that someone's child is sick (so I might make a treat to drop by) or that their cat died (I might send a card or give a call)? Is it bad of me, when I'm feeling especially excited about something or worried or wanting more information, to ask other people with whom I have some things in common, to go on a post a message? Does this make me some kind of crazy person?
Sure, I know people who probably post too much information but for someone like me, I'm o.k. with that, usually. I like honesty, I like transparency, I value people who are out there and who share what they really think and feel. I don't like trying to figure out whether you really agree with someone or whether you might have another opinion. I suppose that some of it might be related to the fact that I am very careful in choosing friends that I opt for people who 1. are compassionate, 2. don't mind people who disagree and 3. who like to move beyond small talk (my introverted heart has trouble with small talk - if I don't feel like we are connecting, I feel like something is wrong). I probably am too "out" on Facebook for some people - I don't hide that I am a Christian, that I value compassion and social justice or that I love my family. I do call injustice when I see it and sometimes, that might make someone uncomfortable. I have a hard time seeing how that is a bad thing. I guess, on some level, it might be like not raising politics or religion at the dinner table but if these people are supposed to be "my friends", won't they still love me even if my opinion is different from theirs? Maybe, just maybe, there might be useful dialogue that comes from these Facebook discussions sometimes (provided that people behave with respect and I find that my friends do). My policy is that I don't say anything on Facebook that I would be ashamed to admit to (so yes, while I won't tell you that I can't stand this person I am working with, I might address an issue of concern to me in education if I feel that it is harming the well-being of children). I'd happily admit to my boss or my minister or my mom what I am saying, so why is it a bad thing? Maybe it might be potentially held again me down the road but I come from a family of political activists - data was being collected on them for their stands long before Google came along.
Am I naive or taking unnecessary risks or am I just having the courage to say what I think is right and potentially to risk pushing people a bit in their thinking? I'm not sure - I suppose this post sounds like I am entirely defending my position but that isn't entirely what I'm doing here. I think I'm still working it out. In the meantime, I probably won't shut up because I'm not good at that :-)
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Yarn Along
And now for my favourite post of the week, my Yarn Along post. The Yarn Along is hosted by Ginny over at small things and I am SO grateful for it - I love to see what other people are knitting and reading. The only hazard is that my "to knit" and "to read" lists are getting so long!
Stitching - before we get to my knitting, I decided to include the hearts plastic canvas needlepoint that my daughter and I have started working on. She has been dying for me to get her knitting for a while and when I saw these kits on sale for $3.99 at Christmas, I couldn't resist. No, it's not knitting but it's a start. It's funny, I'm a knitter and a kindergarten teacher but I am NOT the most patient knitting teacher and when we have tried so far, I haven't been anywhere near the gentle teacher I'd like to be. I have found a few wonderful Waldorf poems for teaching stitch formation that have helped but I just don't think that she is quite ready yet. This kit is a nice bridge - we are stitching together, she is very proud of what she is doing and I love it because it's the way my mom taught me years ago. Over March Break, next week, I am planning on finishing this with her and then, we will, if my patience will hold out, do a bit of knitting together.
Knitting - I am getting near the end of the Guernsey wrap and I am so excited! It's an easy pattern and being here and part of the Yarn Along has finally gotten me really going. I am on row 15 of the last time through the pattern (it goes up to row 78 and then, there are several rows of edging). We are going to be spending quite a bit of time in the car over the next few days, so I am hoping that I will have it done by the weekend and I already have my next project ready to go. I don't think that there is much I love more than starting a project and with March Break next week, I am hoping to get LOTS done!
Reading - I finished The Long Way Home by Louise Penny yesterday and thanks to a nasty case of strep throat and two days home in bed, I have managed to make a very large dent in Lost Lake by Sarah Addison Allen (who I really like). I've gone three more chapters in The Fringe Hours by Jessica Turner and am working more on Found by Micha Boyett, which I LOVE LOVE LOVE! I feel like such a church outsider sometimes - I am such a funny mix of Evangelical and mainline and while I love the preaching at our current church, I so miss liturgy and tradition and this book is speaking to my soul. I can't recommend it enough for anyone who is an oddity, like me.
I can't wait to hear what everyone else is knitting and reading this week!
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