New Blog

So, I have a new blog started for more general family stuff.  I won't be including fertility or Dh's problems there.  I would love you to visit and I may include notices here when anything interesting happens there.  If you wouldn't mind, I would appreciate it if you don't mention this one there.  There are some things that are better just shared with online friends.

Funny Story

I had to laugh.  After yesterday's post, when I mentioned Christian hospitality and lemon bread, we had a funny event here last night.  

To understand the story, you need to understand that Dh grew up in a small town and he will talk to ANYONE.  When we were in the city, it was a bit alarming.  Living here, I wonder whether people think he is one of the local crazies but at least he is viewed as being friendly.

So... just before I took the dogs for a walk, the doorbell rang and it was a young man collecting pledges for Sick Kids Hospital.  He started his spiel and I asked him to stop and come back.  I didn't want to commit without talking to Dh.  We usually do all our giving at church but looking at the pictures of all the sick children and thinking of the people we have known who have had to use Sick Kids in sad circumstances, I felt like we should probably give.  He agreed to come back after dinner.

7:30 arrived and no guy.  I wondered but wasn't too concerned.  I did Pk's bath and she was in her jammies getting ready for bed when I heard a strange voice.  My FIL came to tell me that it was the guy back from Sick Kids.  I got Pk down (it was a task last night) and when I finally came out of Pk's room, I could still hear voices.  I got to the top of the stairs and Dh opened the door and said, "It's the Sick Kids people.  I've agreed to pledge but they need their ride back to Toronto and he isn't here.  It's raining."  I could see what he was working up to.  "Do you want to invite them in?"  "Well, I think we should".  Next thing I knew, we had two people sitting on our rec room couch, drinking tea and eating the lemon bread.  They were very grateful and made a lot of comments about my selling the lemon bread....

So, if my blog disappears, you will know that my computer has been stolen by the people who scouted out our house.  Luckily, it really  is the only thing we have worth stealing.

Another Update

I am going to keep this short because my day alone is rapidly disappearing.  Things seem to be beginning to improve.  Dh finally got in to see our doctor yesterday.  She was wonderful and I feel like we are finally on our way to dealing with his depression.  I think he felt a lot better about it, too.  We may have more  of a fertility struggle than we though but at least we are more aware of what is happening.  Our doctor's first priority is to get Dh sleeping (he is often awake much of the night and when he does sleep, he has terrible dreams).  The next step will be conquering the depression and then dealing with his lack of eating.  I think she is thinking that dealing with the sleeping with improve the other things right away.  In the name of trying to improve his sleep, one thing we are planning this weekend is to transition Pk's bed.  She has a convertible crib and we are thinking of turning it into a daybed.  That way, she can get out of bed and come to us in the night if she needs us and we don't have to listen for her through the monitor (which really keeps both of us awake).  The only challenge will be remembering to put the baby gate up (we are going to section things off so that she can come out of her room and into ours but can't access anywhere else - I can't imagine what I would find in the morning if she got into the kitchen without me).

To those of you who have been praying, I can't thank you enough.  The Power of a Praying Wife has really helped but most of all, it has been wonderful to feel like I am not alone.

Favourites Friday

I am being bad today.  I took a day off from work.  I don't make a habit of it (actually, before Pk's arrival, I was very rarely off).  This year, sadly, I have been off more than I would have liked but usually, the days are spent wiping a running nose and hugging a feverish, cranky little body.  Today, I'm home just for me.  I needed what, when I was growing up, we referred to as a "mental health" day.  I have definitely been needing some mental health!

Knowing I was going to be off from work, I decided that I HAD to get a post done for the blog.  Lately, it feels more like my whining post than anything else.  While things have been been terrible, I do feel like my life is pretty nice when it isn't spinning out of control.  God has blessed me with things that really bring me a sense of contentment.  I like my "favourites Friday" idea and debated what to write about today.  A bit of time at home reminded me how much I like home!

We live in a village and I have said before how much I like it.  I grew  up in the big city and never knew that I might be happy anywhere else.   Life was good if extremely expensive but I never really felt like I fit.  My naturopath told me not too long ago that I should have been born in an earlier time than I was and I agree.  As a newcomer to a small town, all the things that drive people crazy are pretty nice to me.  I thought I would take you on a bit of a tour.

One thing I love about our town is that other than in the new subdivision where there are some townhouses, the houses are far apart.  That may not seem like a big deal to you but to me, it's wonderful.  I grew up in extremely tight semis in Toronto and then Dh and I lived in the top floor of one for several years before making our move.  I don't have to live with anyone else's cooking smells (other than the odd barbecue and they usually just smell tempting!), don't have to worry about anyone else's music or to be threatened by anyone else's bugs.  We get along really well with our neighbours and while I know that isn't limited to a small town, I think ours is pretty special that way.  In late summer and fall, we often come home to find veggies on our doorstep from neighbours and at Christmas, you never know who is going to leave you treats.  We have a great food exchange going on with our next-door neighbours right now.  Tony and Renate are a bit older than we are and have bought a fairly basic house on a gorgeous lot and are slowly turning it into their dream home.  Dh went by to say hi a couple of weeks ago and they were in the midst of painting their new shed (I would adore to have one like this as a playhouse for Pk when she gets older but these sheds cost thousands!).  They were saying that they didn't have any dinner and were in the middle of the job and didn't want to stop.  They weren't asking, they were just chatting.  Dh came home and told me and I just happened to have a casserole in the oven.  I threw half of it into a dish and sent it back over.  The dish was returned several days later, filled with delicious shepherd's pie.  Last weekend, I tried a rhubarb custard pie recipe that I had gotten from a blog.  Tony loves rhubarb and Renate hates it so we have a deal that when the rhubarb is ready from their garden, it is delivered to me and whatever I make, Tony gets a piece.  Seems like a fair deal to me.  This also makes me feel good because I have been reading a lot about hospitality as a Christian ideal and I feel like it's a kind of outreach.
Another thing we love are the small businesses in town.  They don't look like much (our town probably isn't the prettiest in the world although some of the century homes in the older part of town are lovely) but they are friendly and you would be surprised at what you can buy.  Our local pharmacy is great.  As Dh says, you probably wouldn't want to go there to get Viagara in case you run into someone but the pharmacists are incredibly helpful and put you at your ease.
Every small town needs a good Chinese restaurant and while the menu focus is on chicken balls and fried rice, they make wonderful soups.  I love the San Woo beef soup, Dh is partial to the hot and sour and Pk loves the wonton.
Who knew that in a town this size, we would have a great little whole foods shop.  They have organic and natural meats, eggs, dairy, fruit, vegs and all kinds of healthier packaged stuff.  I love it because again, everyone is one a first name basis.  Katie, who is usually on when we go in, knows our routine.  We enter, grab a gala apple for Pk, Katie takes it in the back and washes it and Pk happily munches while I shop.  Pk calls it the "apple store".  Dh is a true carnivore and if I take him with me, we always come back with some kind of sausage or nitrate free meat snack of some kind.

I could have driven around taking pics of favourite town institutions all day but I decided it was better to come back home in case I ran into someone from work.  I will try another town post another day with some of my other favourite spots.

In the meantime, speaking of favourites, my father-in-law is coming down this evening to spend the night so he and Dh can watch the F.A. Cup tomorrow (Go, Chelsea, Go... Blue is the Colour!!!) and so I wanted to make a sweet treat that I know he likes.  This lemon bread is really, really yummy and whenever I take it anywhere, I get demands for the recipe.

Lemon Tea Loaf

(taken from Anne Lindsay's Lighthearted Everyday Cooking)

1 c granulated sugar   250 ml

1/4 c soft margarine or butter    50 ml

1 egg

2 Tbsp low fat yogurt     25 ml

1/2 c milk    125 ml

1 1/2 c all-purpose flour    375 ml

1 tsp baking powder   5 ml

grated rind of 1 lemon

Glaze:

juice of 1 lemon

1/4 granulated sugar  50 ml

Line and 8 by 4 inch loaf pan with foil; grease lightly.

In large bowl, cream sugar and margarine.  Beat in egg and yogurt; beat in milk.  Mix flour and baking powder; beat into egg mixture until blended.  Stir in lemon rind.

Spoon into prepared pan; bake in 350F oven for 1 hour or until cake tester inserted in centre comes out dry.  Let cake stand in pan for 3 minutes. 

Glaze:  In small bowl, coming lemon juice and sugar, mixing well; pour over top of warm cake.  Remove foil and cake from pan and place on rack.  Loosen foil and let cake cool completely before cutting.

I haven't tried soaking but reading the recipe, it's silly that I haven't since it contains yogurt.  I tried it with whole wheat flour and it wasn't bad but it wasn't the same.  It might be nicer soaked as I find the soaked grains are often fluffier.  This is lovely with a cup of tea and would be nice on a summer afternoon as part of a picnic.

Blogging Advice Please

I would love some advice, please.  When I started this blog, I had no idea what it was going to become for me.  I don't know that anyone else would enjoy it especially but I have had a wonderful time here and it has become my primary means of expressing my feelings about a number of things that have been going on in my life lately.  I am struggling because on the one hand, I love the anonymity of the blog and being able to vent about my struggles but on the other hand, it would be nice to set up a blog that I could use to put out the more public face of our family.  It would be nice to share the nice family stuff with my brother, for instance, but he doesn't need an insider view of our infertility struggles.

Obviously, the best thing to do would be to start another blog.  Here's my dilemma.  I would like to create a blog that you could get to from here but where you couldn't necessarily travel back in the other direction, if that makes sense.  This would become my online journal, my private face for my online friends who have been here for me.  The other blog would be for public consumption.  Could I create a new blog on blogger but not have it appear publically on my profile?  Would it be better to just start an entirely new blog with an entirely different profile somewhere else?  I would love any advice from you.  Do you have one blog, two or more?  How do you decide what to post?

Going Back to the Land???

It probably doesn't look like much but I am really excited.  We have finally put in a raised vegetable bed.  We got it planted this evening - lettuce, carrots, tomatoes, peppers, peas, leeks, onions, basil, cilantro and parsley.  Who knows how it will do - we usually just grow tomatoes and basil and have probably done everything wrong.  I don't care.  I always get such an immense sense of satisfaction when I am able to cook with things that I have grown.  If I won the lottery (difficult since I don't buy tickets and don't really think I approve), I would buy a house out of town and have a large veggie bed and a few chickens... Dh and I really could turn into the couple from "The Good Neighbours" (a 1970's British sit-com about a couple who decide to go back to the land in suburbia and drive their neighbours insane).  Pk got into the act too - she decided to harvest basil before it was planted - I'll keep you posted on whether it survives.  

Our New Church

For the last ten years, our church has worshipped in a hockey arena.  The church started as part of a vision and understanding of our ministers - they could see that the town was growing at a huge rate and there were no new churches coming.  They went to our denomination and asked that a church be planted.  It was basically dropped in their laps and our church was born.  

We joined the journey late.  The church started in 1997 and we wandered in, lost and looking for a church family, in 2006.  We had no idea how much our lives would change.  We joined small groups, went on outings, made important "church family" connections and really strengthened our faith.  We had been looking for a place that we could be a part of things and where the faith was truly lived and not just on Sunday.  At Kespres, we found that.

The only frustration were the limitations placed on a church without a building.  Groups could only be small (at people's homes) and to do special events was very complicated.  While the arena worked well for a while, it did get a bit frustrating listening to the hockey crowds screaming during worship (our minister joked that he should have taught the organist to play the hockey themes).  When we joined the church in 2006, land had been donated for building but nothing had been started.  A committee had started work but had eventually fallen apart.

Finally, a year ago April, we broke ground.  Dh went up a lot during the summer to help with building and has spent almost every Saturday this winter working at the site doing all kinds of odd jobs.  We have helped with fundraising dinners and "talents and treasures" campaigns.

We finally got to see the final results today.  We started our worship at the "Ice Palace".  We set up our folding chairs for the last time and did some reminiscing about our time there.  Finally, we packed up and moved on.

We all arrived at the new building and waited to enter together.  Our ministers' daughter opened the door and we all entered with a true sense of wonder.  It was hard to believe that this day had finally arrived.

These photos don't do the church justice.  I adore it.  It is light, airy and totally simple - very much a Presbyterian church.  The space is flexible and elegant, perfect as a multipurpose place in the community with a focus on welcoming people into God's house.  Our motto is "People discovering what it means to follow Jesus in our time."  They tried to design the church building with our faith and beliefs in mind.

This morning, worship was for our members.  It was very moving and the sense of excitement was palpable.  This afternoon, we did the official "dedication" for the "mukety mucks".  As my parents said, in their 50+ years in the denomination, they have been to church closings but never an opening.  This is such an exciting time for us.  The place was packed and filled with optimism.

Please, pray for us.  We have such hopes that we will be able to do God's work in our town and to create a true place of welcome for all who seek.  For Dh and I personally, our church family is an essential part of who we are and even more importantly, where we want to work at "being a family".  We hope to be able to contribute to continuing to build this wonderful place!