Feeling Grouchy

Someone sent this to me today and I felt the need to share it (not that any of you would say or do these things). Something about pregnancy seems to make people especially insensitive and I am feeling it right now - no, I do not need to hear anyone's opinion that my belly is HUGE (somehow telling me that it's just my belly but nothing else seems to make it acceptable to comment), I do not need to hear that there is no way this baby is going to stay in much longer, I do not need to hear that I look like the baby will be 10 lbs, I do not need to hear that the baby is "so high" that he must be breech, or, best of all, I do not need my in-laws to share a card with Dh on his birthday from his sister and then insist that it is his responsibility to patch things up with her before the baby is born, despite the fact that her "apology" and "awareness that she can't treat you like that" and "evidence that she has changed" consisted of "I think of you every day. I love you." (wow, I don't think I have ever heard less of an apology). Sorry, this grouchy, huge, hormonal woman is feeling a bit touchy right now and would appreciate a teeny bit of consideration.

There. Rant finished. Enjoy.

The pregnancy 10 commandments

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I saw this and thought it was funny. Enjoy!!!

The Pregnancy Ten Commandments


1. The appropriate response to a couple telling you they are having a baby is "Congratulations" with enthusiasm. Any other response makes you a jerk.


2. Through the wonders of science, we now know that babies are made ONLY by the mother and father- not grandparents. Unless the baby is in your uterus, or you are the man that helped put it there, you may not ever use the phrase "my baby"


3. On the same note, unless you made the baby as defined in #2, the pregnancy, birth and the raising of the child are not about you. You do not have input. No one wants to hear your opinion unless they ask for it.

4. The body of a pregnant woman should be treated the same as any other body. You would not randomly touch someone's stomach if they were not pregnant, nor would you inquire into the condition of their uterus, cervix or how they plan to use their breasts. Pregnancy does not remove all traces of privacy from a woman.

5. Likewise, no woman wants to hear comments on her weight- ever. A pregnant woman does not find it flattering that you think she is about to pop, must be having twins, looks swollen or has gained weight in her face. Telling her she looks too small only makes her worry that she is somehow starving her baby. Making such comments invite her to critique your physical appearance and you may not act offended. The only acceptable comment on appearance is "You look fabulous!"

6. Most of us have picked up on the fact that summer is hot. We are hot every summer when we are not pregnant. We don't need you to point out that we will be miserably hot before the baby comes.

7. There is a reason that tickets to Labor & Delivery are not yet sold on Ticketmaster. Childbirth is actually not a public event. It may sound crazy, but some women really do not relish the idea of their mother, mother-in-law or a host of other family members seeing their bare butt or genitals. Also, some people simply feel like the birth of their child is a private and emotional moment to be shared only by the parents.

8. Like everything else in life, unless you receive an invitation, you are not invited. This includes doctor appointments, ultrasounds, labor, delivery, the hospital and the parents' home. You do not decide if you will be there for the birth or if you will move in with the new parents to "help out". If your assistance is desired, rest assured that you will be asked for it.

9. If you are asked to help after the birth, this means you should clean up the house, help with cooking meals, and generally stay out of the way. Holding the baby more than the parents, interfering with breastfeeding and sleeping schedules and making a woman who is still leaking fluid from various locations lift a finger in housework is not helping.


10. The only people entitled to time with the baby are the parents. Whether they choose to have you at the hospital for the birth or ask you to wait 3 weeks to visit, appreciate that you are being given the privilege of seeing their child. Complaining or showing disappointment only encourages the parents to include you less.

Checking In

I have been meaning to get on and write but I have to admit, I am just too tired this week. I finish work on Friday (hooray!!!) and so this week is crazy-busy trying to get everything ready. I have several posts in mind and they will come, I just need to get through the week first. It doesn't help, either, that this baby seems to be attempting a jail break over the last few days - I am being kicked and beaten in places that I had never imagined were possible. It doesn't do much for sleeping. The good news is that when I was at the o.b. on Monday, baby is head down and seems to be well-positioned and my blood pressure was good so the game plan, according to my o.b., is to "let nature take its course". Cross your fingers for me - I was induced the last time and didn't enjoy that particular experience. I would like to attempt this one naturally (provided that he isn't massively huge).

Talk soon!

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all of the wonderful women out there who bring love to a child, whether young or grown, whether that woman is mother or not.

I knew that I wanted to write a Mother's Day post but I really struggled about what to say. Mother's Day has so much significance to so many people and yet, it can be such a wonderful day or such an incredibly painful day, depending of your life circumstances. I kept debating, do I focus on the joys of motherhood or do I write about the pain that I know is associated with this day for so many? I have decided to touch a bit on each.

Motherhood has been the most powerful experience of my life. Pk has taught me about joy in ways that I could have never imagined - I now understand what it is to have a piece of my heart walking around outside of my body There is nothing like being told that someone loves you and in a way that leaves you with absolutely no doubt. There is something so powerful about being truly needed. There is nothing like the way that a little person can fill your arms or the sweetness of a head on your shoulder. Who knew that sharing just about anything could be so precious? I see the world in a totally different way that I could never have imagined before this little body joined us. I also know guilt of a depth that I had never experienced before, frustration that is almost indescribable and, at times, a sadness and helplessness that makes me feel that my heart will break. Motherhood has a power that is so profound. It leaves none of us untouched.

For so many, there is also such a sadness to this day. I have a friend who has basically given up the battle with infertility and this is a Sunday that she does not venture to church - it leaves her too raw and feeling too excluded. I read a wonderful blog post today that addresses some of these issues and I suggest you give it a read. For others, they are missing a mother who was a special influence in life and today reminds them of the loss. Laura wrote a touching post on this subject. It's hard to know how to best honour mothers and motherhood but to do it in a way that recognizes everyone.

Really, after these reflections, what I am left with, and what you have probably already seen reflected here, is the power that motherhood has on all of us. It is the most priceless gift and the most awesome responsibility. It can change everything about us and its absence can leave us with a hole that is almost impossible to fill. Today, I hope that you have a chance to reflect on the wonderful women in your life who have helped to shape who you are and that you can also appreciate any experiences you have had with that power. I will be enjoying my little girl, treasuring the movements I am feeling (at the moment, most especially, the chronic hiccups), feeling so lucky to have had the chance to go on this journey, and saying thank you to my mother and hoping that my grandmother, who left my life at age 12, is able to know what a gift she was to me.

Happy Mother's Day.

Baby Stuff I Love

I started this series last week and then promptly forgot about it, sorry. It's been quite a week - we have been fighting a war with a raccoon and it has now ripped open the roof so we have been working with the bank and interviewing roofers - just the way I expected to spend the last bit of my pregnancy. On the plus side, my wonderful family doctor gave me a note this week and I will be starting my leave early, finishing next Friday at 35 weeks (there's nothing wrong, she could just see that I am exhausted and finding it hard to manage it all at this point). I am thrilled. I am praying that baby doesn't arrive until at least 37 weeks - there is just so much to do and I would also like to get a little bit of time to think, pray and organize so that when the time does come, I don't feel so unprepared.

Anyway, I was pondering what to tell you about and at Pk's music class this morning, I thought I would share the joys we have experienced through the Kindermusik programme, which happens to begin at birth. We started when Pk was a year old but with this baby, I would like to start earlier.

There are lots of children's music classes out there, some much better than others. We did a fun Mother Goose programme at the library, one at the parenting centre and a fantastic class that was offered by an Orff specialist at the local library when Pk was younger. I should probably preface this by saying that my undergrad degree is in music and I am somewhat picky - it makes me insane to go to a class that is marketed as a "music" class when the instructor can't model in-tune singing and when the singing features some of the less attractive features of amateur karaoke. We have had a great experience with our Kindermusik instructors.

Kindermusik is a developmental programme that mixes music, literacy, movement and instruments (I believe that the infant classes also have an infant massage component, as well). It's a once weekly programme and registration includes the class itself, a book or two for the enrolled child that connects to the unit being explored, a parent guide with excellent suggestions for exploring the musical concepts at home, CDs featuring the music that will be explored in class and an instrument. The CDs have become a favourite for us at home and I have found that the selection of music on the CD is excellent - children are exposed to a number of genres, music from around the world, classical ("art") music and language (finger plays and rhymes). We have taken several classes now and I have to say, for us, the best class has been the Family Time class (a class offered to meet the needs of different ages, a real bonus for parents who have more than one child and don't have the time to take several classes). As an childhood music specialist, I have consistently been impressed by the range of musical concepts that are explored from high and low, timbre, tempo, dynamics and instrumentation and all in the context of a developmentally appropriate class - we don't find ourselves fighting the toddler need to move and to explore. The expectations of the child are very reasonable, making the class enjoyable for everyone. Pk has gotten to play all kinds of instruments, can identify many instruments of the orchestra, is demonstrating awareness of beat and is beginning to do some pitch matching - not bad at 2 1/2. As far as we are concerned, this programme is worth every cent (and at $130 for ten weeks including all of the materials, I think it is very, very reasonably priced).

The only caveat I have in recommending the class is that some instructors are better than others. Luckily, it is a very widespread programme these days and if you live in an urban centre, you shouldn't have any trouble at all finding multiple classes. We love our instructor Laura and plan to keep going with the programme as long as possible.

Recipe Round-Up

I have been having fun trying new recipes and I thought I would share links to a few favourites from the last week. Enjoy!

I never thought that I could cook fish in the crockpot. I have tried two of Stephanie's recipes from A Year of Slow Cooking and both were wonderful. This week, we tried her Foil Packet Tilapia and it was delicious and the house smelled wonderful (not something I often say with fish!).

Dh is a real meat and potatoes man so when I saw this recipes for meatballs in a horseradish gravy, we had to try them. While they took a while to prepare, they fed us for two nights and were yummy with buttered, whole wheat noodles and a salad. While I am at it, another recipe I tried from this blog not too long ago and ADORED was this Potato Pie. Not exactly "health food" but very yummy and great as part of a meal for company.

On Tuesday, Pk and I were home together and I realised that while she and I have made muffins together many times, we have never actually made cookies. I wanted to find something low in sugar and these Banana Oatmeal Cookies were perfect - whole grains, no sugar and yummy. Dh didn't think they were very sweet but I thought they were great. I love the recipes at Mothering when I am looking for something healthy.

I don't know how much longer I will be doing much cooking but I will try to keep up with the new recipes as long as I can. I love discovering new meals so I can keep things from getting boring!

Tuesdays Unwrapped

Spring in Minnesota: Crab Apple Blossoms by jpellgen

Out the front of our house, we have two beautiful mock apple trees. At this time of year, the smell is overpowering and it comes in all the windows on the breeze. There is no air freshener more lovely or a more wonderful reminder of the joys of spring.

Beading Workshop

At church, it isn't uncommon to get invited to a shopping party - Pampered Chef and Partylite being the most common. I don't mind going but I have to say, I do find them VERY expensive. Last night, a friend from church had a different kind of party and I have to say, this was one I really enjoyed!

This party was actually called a "Beading Workshop." The woman running the workshop had been a missionary in Ghana, West Africa for 2 years. While she was there, she developed a real love for the beauty of the beading work done there and when the time came to return to Canada, she wanted to find something that she could do to both maintain a contact with Africa and to help the wonderful people she met. Big Village beads was born.

All of the beads are made from recycled glass, mainly from bottles. Some are also hand painted with beautiful colours and designs. I love the look of beach glass and many of the beads remind me of that. At the workshops, you are provided with an overwhelming selection of beautiful beads and given support to design your own jewelry. I made myself a necklace and earring set, a bracelet and earring set and a bracelet for Pk. I had so much fun. It was a bit overwhelming at first but once I got going, I could see that I could become totally addicted to this.

The jewelry is a lovely weight - I love the chunkiness and coolness of the glass. It also feels really good to know that what I am buying is going directly to help a fair trade industry in a third world country. Normally, when I attend "home sales" parties, I resent being asked to host a party. I have to admit, this time, I am seriously considering hosting a party of my own down the line. Everyone gets a chance to have a visit and to make beautiful jewelry at the same time.