First of all, it looks like all is well, at least at this point. Nothing has been critical but I have hit the stage where the little things do creep up and I turn into a nervous wreck. All was easy until the 28 week mark when I switched from my GP to my o.b. The o.b. is nice but his is a very, very busy practice and he is very much a "dot the i's and cross the t's" kind of man (which is a good thing, in the long run but it means that I have had more tests than I did with Pk and tests always terrify me). My first appointment with him, I was getting my glucose test results and since a number of people had gotten pleasure from telling me how huge I was, I became very afraid that I had gestational diabetes. I went to the appointment and I could feel the near-panic attack start as soon as I walked in the door. Of course, the sugar test results were fine but my b.p. was off the scale since I was afraid. I told him that I have white coat but that resulted in having to go for a non-stress test at the hospital a few days later.
Obviously, if you know me, the n.s.t. was enough to really set me off. The baby responded beautifully (he is active as anything). I hate being on a monitor and to be totally honest, I didn't like the nurse at all that I was dealing with. She hooked me up, walked away and disappeared for 45 minutes, leaving me on my back (am I the only pregnant women who really suffers from being on my back after a certain point???). By the time she came to take my b.p., I was sore, grouchy and feeling terrible. Of course, it was borderline again. Ugh. The only thing that made me feel better was that when I saw my naturopath later that week, when I was feeling calm, it was 112/72 (not exactly high).
It didn't go any higher so my o.b. began to see that yes, it is stress and yes, I do seem to have what borders on a panic attack going into his office. I know, it's totally stupid but I know that I am definitely not the only woman who suffers from this. Anyway, we seemed to be in a fairly good place with all of this until last week (a week ago Thursday). B.p. was fine that appointment but baby decided to go from measuring slightly above normal for size to being at least 5, if not 6 or 7 cm larger than he should be). I was beside myself because Pk was no small baby (9 lbs, 1 oz) and her size was an issue at the end (mainly because they had me so scared that she was going to be 12 lbs that my b.p. started to climb - see the pattern here???). I ended up being sent last Friday for a 2 hour glucose test (I am quite proud of myself - 3 blood draws in two hours and I didn't bat an eyelash). I also needed an ultrasound but wasn't able to do that until yesterday. As you can imagine, at Thursday's appointment, when I was nervous about the test results, my b.p. went super high again. Good news is that my sugar test results were great and after being asked to lie down and think boring thoughts for 20 minutes, b.p. was back down to 120/70 but I was given the choice of having to go for another N.S.T. (which I am sure would lead to induction since I HATE being on a monitor and on my back) or buying a b.p. cuff and taking it at home. I think you can guess what I opted for - I am supposed to start taking my b.p. today.
The last hurdle was the ultrasound and I will be forever grateful to God that it went the way that it did. I don't know about you but my experience with them has been that 1. they never tell you anything which is really scary and leads me to walk away trying to read into everything they say and 2. at least later in a pregnancy, I get really, really, really sore after them. I was dreading going yesterday but the woman doing it was wonderful and I don't know why but she shared everything with me. Yes, it is a boy for sure, his heartrate is 136 which is right in normal range, he is very active, his head is down and at the moment, his back is to my left side. He is larger than average but still totally within normal perimeters (when she measured his head, she told me that while it is slightly larger than average, it will be no problem for delivery) and she even showed me his size on a graph (without giving actual weights) and pointed out that while he is above the average line, he is not anywhere near where he would be if he was huge. She said that everything looks good. I cried with relief. At this point last week, I was wondering whether I should schedule a c-section and be done with it. Now, I have some confidence that I will make it.
Overall, I am o.k. Because of the ultrasound yesterday, I am extremely sore and spent much of the night dealing with hip and back pain and wondering whether it was pre-labour but this morning, I just feel tired and achy. I have to say, I don't know whether this is a boy thing but I am being hammered, especially in the evening (to the point that once I lie in bed, I end up getting up and going and reading in the rocker for an hour, just to see if I can get him to settle). Another benefit of the ultrasound is knowing that he is head down because he is hammering so badly on my cervix when he gets going that it feels as if he is trying to kick his way out. I don't remember being this sore from the movement with Pk but at least I know he is well.
So, now you know my sorry, pathetic tale. Say a prayer for me or cross your fingers. I haven't done my b.p. yet this morning because my naturopath told me that it might be higher after a night of very poor sleep. I am going to have a lot to drink, try to catch my breath and see where we are at. I feel so silly and stupid for all the worry about my b.p. If you have any suggestions, I would love to hear them because it seems to be something that I just can't seem to control.